I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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