Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
