Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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