ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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