If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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