Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize