he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
