i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.