Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
