Is it because I queefed?
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
nutella sex= disaster
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize
