Where did you get a picture of my penis
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
