it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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