I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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