Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
