Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Barsexuality is the new black.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Randomize
