if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize