You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
His hands were made for my vagina.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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