butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
