That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
