Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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