bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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