I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
