Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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