What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
