Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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