honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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