is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
