Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
