lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
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