Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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