you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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