Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Randomize