NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
