you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Blood and glitter go together right?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize