their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
