I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
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