She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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