yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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