two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
