Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize