dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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