covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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