doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
