Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize
