I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
