its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
