Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
