I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
