so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize