I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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