every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
