Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
